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#886530 --- 09/21/08 09:51 PM For the Groaners

1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir
Circumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
out to be an optical Aleutian .

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are
looking into it.

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.
When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small
medium at large.

20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veteran.

21. A backward poet writes inverse.

22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.

#886568 --- 09/22/08 03:38 AM Re: For the Groaners [Re: ]
sparky's back Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 11/12/07
Posts: 9386
Loc: At the kitchen!!
BBQ..June there or be square..
Bring something for The House of Concern please!

#886871 --- 09/22/08 02:28 PM Re: For the Groaners [Re: ]
AnneSmile Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 01/31/08
Posts: 9955
Loc: Amusement
I love word play, good one \:\)
One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things.

#887519 --- 09/23/08 04:48 PM Re: For the Groaners [Re: AnneSmile]
pyalum Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 04/21/07
Posts: 1472
Loc: On my cloud
Very clever.