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#1309885 - 12/01/11 08:23 AM
Another Student Took Her Life
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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From Spencerport High School, Tuesday evening. My daughter was on her Facebook and kept reading posts from many of her contacts. This indeed did happen, they were talking about it on the radio this morning. The girl was bullied for one reason or another, she called a friend on Tuesday evening and said she needed someone to talk to, the friend basically told her she didn't have time at that moment. That was the last time anybody heard from the girl.
This is very sad and could have been so easily prevented if only someone had seen the signs and reached out to help her. I do know that some local schools have these anti-bullying programs. Midlakes actually had a pro-wrestler come in and put on a presentation to the students in the beginning of the school year. Students were elected by their peers and their teachers to be upstanders instead of bystanders. I am proud to say that my son was chosen as an upstander as he does not tolerate kids picking on others and he stands up for others. If only many more could do this same thing.
I just wish there was more that society as a whole could do to recognize and prevent this abuse.
Edited by KiDcRaZeD (12/01/11 09:30 AM)
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#1309934 - 12/01/11 01:27 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: dachshunds_rule]
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TLC127
Senior Member
Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 538
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The schools have programs in place that do NOT work. Students and parents need to work together to address this. Some people just can't grasp that bullying has changed over the past 10, 20 or 30 years. I have already decided that if my daughter has anymore problems at school we are going directly to the police. I will encourage other parents to do the same.
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#1309938 - 12/01/11 01:38 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: TLC127]
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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You're absolutely right. The administrators/Pricinpals/teachers do not want to get involved. They don't want angry, out of control parents (bullies parents) coming back at them.
I remember once when my daughter was in 4th grade (she is now 20), she was being very badly by a group of mean little girls, really harsh words "I'm going to kill you", they placed gum in her hair, they would trip her, etc... This all happened while she was at school, I called the Principal about it and her reply to me "we really don't like to get involved, as we don't know what we're dealing with as far as the girl's parents. It's much wiser for you to directly contact the girl's parents rather than having the school." All fine & dandy if this was happening at my house or the girl's house, but this was happening on school grounds where kids should feel safe, not threatened!!!
It is out of control and schools need to clamp down on the bullies and start listening to the victims, punishing the consistent bullying perpetrators.
The schools have programs in place that do NOT work. Students and parents need to work together to address this. Some people just can't grasp that bullying has changed over the past 10, 20 or 30 years. I have already decided that if my daughter has anymore problems at school we are going directly to the police. I will encourage other parents to do the same.
Edited by KiDcRaZeD (12/01/11 01:39 PM)
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#1309959 - 12/01/11 02:56 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: cRaZeD]
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TLC127
Senior Member
Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 538
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My daughter is 14. She has been bullied to the point that she has asked to change schools. I have seen what people had said about her on facebook. Her father and I notified the parents to have the comments removed. Most of them have no idea what their kids are doing on the computers! Thank God this year has been better. She is organizing her own anti-bullying message outside of school. She has even been offered a meeting place for the group members. One of the girls she has had problems with turned my daughter in for bullying. The little cupcake didn't know who my daughter had been talking with and getting help from in forming the group. Needless to say,my daughter was not in trouble. But...the little cupcake didn't get into trouble for making a flase statement either.
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#1309989 - 12/01/11 04:15 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: TLC127]
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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That's great that you're daughter is sticking it out at school, instead of moving to another district. A lot of times girls do this due to bullying and end up worse than if they had stayed at their original school. I believe parents need to take a stand and protect their children, if the school officials are not going to. Facebook - that's a whole other story - it's nothing but evil, I don't even have one but I make my teen girls show me their pages and they do get monitored. There was just way too much drama for me on there. I'm glad your daughter has also formed her own anti-bullying message. It would be great if it could really take off and she could many kids involved even from other school districts. Anything it takes to make the teachers, parents, administrators more aware of this problem and to take action against it.
Yes, I graduated in 1987 - it has gotten much worse. We didn't have cell phones, texting, computer networking. That stuff spreads like the plague quicker than you can even blink. At least when we went home from school at night - the bullying was over until the next day. Actually, I was a pretty tiny girl at 4'10" and under 100 lbs., but I did not take crap from anybody and would fight back and pummel someone to the ground. Is it the answer (well, I would like to say "no" but how do you let someone stand there fighting you w/o defending yourself.) Of course, I'd end up in the Principal's office and receive detention while the other girls would not admit their part in the bullying. It was one time I went home with bruises on my arm and scratches on my nose...like a cat got me. When I told my dad what had happened, the next day he drove me into school and marched into the Principal's office declaring that I had been the victim of a fight and because I got in trouble for fighting back the last time, I just let it go. My father told the Principal that I am to fight back and not ever come home looking like I did that one evening. After that, I have to say the Principal took me under his wing and we ended up getting along great. I pretty much never got in trouble for anything after that, and if I saw others picking on people - I stood up to them. I really hate Bullies!!!
My daughter is 14. She has been bullied to the point that she has asked to change schools. I have seen what people had said about her on facebook. Her father and I notified the parents to have the comments removed. Most of them have no idea what their kids are doing on the computers! Thank God this year has been better. She is organizing her own anti-bullying message outside of school. She has even been offered a meeting place for the group members. One of the girls she has had problems with turned my daughter in for bullying. The little cupcake didn't know who my daughter had been talking with and getting help from in forming the group. Needless to say,my daughter was not in trouble. But...the little cupcake didn't get into trouble for making a flase statement either.
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#1310798 - 12/06/11 06:21 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: cRaZeD]
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DR. D
Senior Member
Registered: 07/25/03
Posts: 5738
Loc: Waterloo/Seneca Falls/Junius/T...
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Another thing I want to add is this, prevention starts at home. Parents need to parent, they need to be aware of what their own children are doing.
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#1311641 - 12/13/11 04:17 PM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: Where's the love]
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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It's not about love, nor about having 2 parents. There's this deep dark place called depression. No matter what your network or status might be, depression can afflict many. Just because you have a great family does not mean you will not suffer from depression or another mood disorder. I believe people need to wake up and start watching their children's behavior, if they seem down, depressed, angry, sad then I believe help is needed. Unfortunately, many will just say it's a part of growing up. Not all of it is and until people start accepting depression as a true mental illness, nothing will ever change.
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#1311718 - 12/14/11 08:37 AM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: cRaZeD]
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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Another interesting fact. A study came out saying that those with untreated depression are prone to developing Alzheimer's. My mother developed Alzheimers in her 70's. Unfortunately, after my father passed away. My mother didn't have a network of friends, she didn't socialize much with others outside of the family - she kept to herself, didn't drive and when offere by other seniors to take her to the store, she would decline and call a family member. I'm probably giving too much information, but I believe it's all linked somehow.
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MindMoodNews/story?id=4605479&page=1
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#1311804 - 12/15/11 06:40 AM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: cRaZeD]
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DR. D
Senior Member
Registered: 07/25/03
Posts: 5738
Loc: Waterloo/Seneca Falls/Junius/T...
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Depression is a nasty thing to deal with however parents no matter what the situation need to take time and LISTEN to their kids. Family is the first line in teaching how to deal with any situation weather the child is the bully or the person being bullied.
The current generation has been spoon fed that everyone is the same and we are all equil, how easy is it to target someone when this has been taught? No one has a thick skin and the smallest thing offends everyone.
The old sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me, has been thrown out the window and God forbid you stick you tounge out at anyone (potential suspention......true story).
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#1311808 - 12/15/11 07:05 AM
Re: Another Student Took Her Life
[Re: DR. D]
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cRaZeD
Senior Member
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 2493
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Yes, I do agree with that to some extent as well. My 16 year old tells me stories of boys that mouth off to her, luckily I raised my kids with some pretty tough skin. They give it right back and don't take crap from anybody.
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